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Monday, August 18, 2008

Reacting to reactions


. . . it is not our surroundings, but our reactions that count. ~Lin Yutang

What Mr. Yutang is telling us is that if we can control our reactions we can be OK. If I am angry it is because I have reacted with anger. If I am despondent, it is because I have reacted with despair.

As long as I believe that my reactions are linked totally and solely with the things that have happened, I will be the victim of my emotions, and the sensations of suffering. I won’t even try to control my reaction because I will assume that my reactions are not within my control.

Nothing comes from outside your mind. ~Shunryu Suzuki

Reactions are learned. A bang may naturally make a person react, but a person who works in a bowling alley is not going to react to just any ole regular bang.

If reactions to a bang can be changed or curbed, then our reactions to anything and everything can be changed or curbed.
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It's your thoughts and only yours that are making you feel terrible; you're the only person in the world who can effectively persecute yourself. ~Dr. David Burns, MD

This is a powerful and liberating thought. When you are afraid, you can believe that this fear comes from within yourself, and you can change your reaction of fear to something else, or, you can, at least curb your reactions of fear. You don’t have to be the victim of your reactions regardless of what kind of reaction it might be. Fear, anger, irritation, lust, anxiety, depression, whatever it is that describes your reaction, you can know that it is at least theoretically possible that you can control if, when, and how you will react to a given situation.

This insight may not resolve your reactionary problems, but it will at least give you hope that these sensations you suffer with are coming from within yourself, and eventually, you can and you will learn to curb and control what you feel and how you react.

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